The story itself is set on Earth in the very late 1600s, starting in Florida. It very quickly changes scenes and moves to different locations in the world, including Tibet, but it also introduces, and I am not sure if we should call this a dimension, or a higher plane of existence, but it introduces the Totality or Quintessential State as it is referred to in the Triumvirate Chronicles. In a way, this book, like in the Big Lebowski, is the rug that pulls the entire room together, with respect to concepts in my writing. It is in this book that some concepts that are left as a bit of a mystery are revealed.
But overriding this is the story of Louis, a young immortal from Earth who is literally shit upon by his Master, an old immortal introduced in Genesis, known simply as Remi. I won't say much more about the plot, other than it is a coming of age story, but with a twist. So here are two scenes from Saba'tah of the Endless Winds.
Excerpt 1
“Louis,
I’m talking to you!” Remi insisted.
Louis
returned Remi’s request in silence.
Remi sighed
again.
“Fine,
Louis,” He said. “Why don’t you tell me how you’ve been doing, then? Tell me what you’ve been doing with
yourself. I doubt your life is as
mundane as it looks.”
Louis
laughed at Remi and shook his head.
“Are you serious? I’ve got a better idea,” Louis
replied. “Why don’t you just save yourself the trouble of pretending that you
actually care about my life or my feelings? It’s probably for the best. Why don’t you just drop the façade and all
your usual bullshit and just get right to the main event? Just what is it that you plan to force me to
do, Remi? Just spit it out man, don’t
hold me in suspense.”
“Fine,” Remi
said, with a sour expression on his face, as if Louis had ruined a surprise
party for him. “As you wish, Louis. I want you to go to India with me.”
“And let me
guess, you need me to leave right now, because
time is of the essence, right?.” Louis finished for him.
“Pretty
much. There is a lot at stake here.” Remi replied, his expression even stormier
that usual. For just a moment, Louis may
have begun to think that Remi’s cause was legitimate, but then memories of past
adventures flooded his mind; and in each one of those, time had also been of the essence.
“I
see.” Louis said finally, “and I can
leave under my own power, or I can leave stuffed into a sack by you? Is that how it’s going to be?”
“That’s
about the size of it, Louis. I can’t do
this without you.”
“Thank you
for being honest for once, Remi, at least in the first part of that statement.
I really appreciate it. Doesn’t that
make things easier all the way around?”
“Unfortunately,
the second part of that statement isn’t quite as honest,” Louis continued. “I
doubt very much that I’m the only one
you could rely on for what you need. I know you have others.”
“You know
what, Louis?” Remi spat, “I wanted this to be much more pleasant than you’re
making it.”
“And there
you go again, Remi.” Louis sighed, his frustration showing through. “Please, for once, spare me your lies, and your blame! Just tell me the fucking truth.”
“Well it’s
your birthday in a few days, Louis, don’t you remember?” Remi said, trying to
change the subject, “I was planning on getting you something, something very special. What would you like?”
“I don’t
think you want me to answer that, Remi,” Louis said slowly. “You won’t like the answer.”
“Oh for
God’s sake,” Remi sighed once again. “All right[TP1] [SK2] , I’ll tell you the truth. I
actually already got you something. Something
that you will require for what I need you to do next. I thought it would be a pleasant surprise to
give it to you on the journey, as I was going to take you there in my shuttlecraft.
And maybe give you a quick little space
flight as a treat, as it’s been a few years since I’ve gotten you off this
planet. Wouldn’t that be nice?”
Remi
reached into his pack, and pulled out a small ray pistol, handing it to Louis.
“This one is
of Emvarian make, and it is one of the few things that can harm a fellow immortal[SK3] . Quite nasty to be sure.”
“Really?” Louis
said, examining the compact weapon, which really didn’t look all that threatening
to him, but memories of small weapons that Remi used on past adventures
reminded Louis that the size of the weapon could be quite deceiving. “Thank
you, Remi. Now I can show you how much I appreciate everything you’ve done for
me. I just don’t know how I can repay
you, so it is up to you how you interpret what I am about to do.”
“What’s
that supposed to mean, Louis?” Remi said. “Are you threatening to shoot me? I am still more powerful than you, and you
know I can control you. Don’t think you
can get away with it.”
“No.” Louis
replied, still examining the pistol, turning it over in his hands. “If I thought merely shooting you would have
actually accomplished anything, I would have found a way to do it a long time ago,
or just killed you outright. Don’t be silly. I’ll show
you what I mean.”
And quick
as a flash, before Remi could try and stop him, Louis p[SK4] ut the ray
pistol against [TP5] his own belly, targeting the
source of Guardian powers in all immortals:
the nexus disk. Louis smiled as
he pulled the trigger. With the smallest
of sounds from the pistol, a red flash erupted from its muzzle, briefly lighting
Louis’s belly in hell’s flames.
Louis had
perhaps a second to register that he had not only blown a smoking, bloody
tunnel through the center[TP6] of his torso, but most of the
back of his chair was now gone as well.
He turned his head a little, and saw that he had also created an
impressive, jagged hole in the outside wall of his house. Seeing the
destruction, Louis smiled. For the first
time in forever, he felt free.
That brief moment[SK7] of lucid thought, when Louis
took all of this in, was all that he had, because just as quickly as he had
those thoughts, a blinding wave of agony washed over him and he screamed in
pain. It was so intense that his vision
wavered and greyed around the edges. He couldn’t even stifle the second shriek
that ripped its way out of his mouth.
Louis felt
a sharp, burning sensation layered within the intense waves of pain, and which
spread outwards from the edges of the hole that the pistol had made. It was clear to Louis that there was some sort
of evil sorcery in that weapon: likely
the thing that Remi had told him was called Thadon[SK8]
radiation.
“Louis!”
Remi shouted, reaching towards him a little bit too late to have tried to stop
him. “What the Hell?!? Are you stupid? What the hell [SK9] were you thinking?!”
In the
midst of his agony, Louis managed to smile, although it was strained, and
ultimately rather ghastly. “Just…
showing you… how much I appreciate… everything you’ve done… for me, Remi…but
it… ends here… it has to.”
“Goddammit,
Louis! You complete idiot!!! You know how hard those radioactive wounds
are to heal? Are you trying to kill yourself? I’m not even sure I can help you.”
“What… gave
you… the idea I … even want help?” Louis
coughed and rasped, blood trickling out the corners of his mouth, “I wasn’t
trying… was hoping… I’d succeed in ending…this miserable life.” And with that, Louis’ vision faded to
darkness, much to his relief. I hope this is it. He thought to himself, I’d rather be de…
Louis never
completed that thought as he faded into something, or somewhere else.
Louis also
didn’t die. Instead, he drifted in what
felt like an abyss, with no sensation of the amount of time that passed. To him, it felt like wherever he was, it was a
place beyond thought, speech, or even self.
Excerpt 2
Louis
wasn’t sure where he was. His awareness
told him that he was in some sort of formless
void—at least at first. There was no color, no light, or any other physical
sensation that he could have named. In
fact, he couldn’t feel any sort of physical self at all. All he seemed to have were his thoughts, and
nothing more.
Louis found
himself thinking about a recent treatise by a French philosopher named
Déscartes that he had read while he was still in Paris. Déscartes, whose flesh
had already been dying when Louis had met him, had simply stated: “Cogito, ergo
sum”.
It was those
words, which Louis clung to. He was obviously thinking, and he obviously had
memories. Therefore, Louis felt he still
existed, somewhere. Just where that somewhere
was, who the hell knew. As for what that existence currently was, he
could not have guessed at all. Perhaps
he had somehow become nothing but thought and memory. The only things that immediately came to mind
were the Catholic notions of Purgatory, or perhaps even Limbo. Had it been Paradise or the Inferno, surely
there would be sensation of some sort!
A voice
spoke then, interrupting his thoughts. Whether
it was in his ears or only in Louis’ thoughts, again, Louis had no idea, and at
this point it really didn’t matter to him.
It meant that he was somewhere, and he was not alone. The voice was strange: low-pitched with a gurgling undertone to it,
but Louis didn’t find it unpleasant, just strange.
“St. Croix,”
The voice said in its low gurgle, “I’ve been waiting to speak with you for a
long time now, to put it in your perspective. Yes, I’ve been waiting a very long time. Would
you speak with me?”
Louis
thought about his response, wishing he had his battle axe with him, just in
case. “Who are you and where am I?”
Louis demanded. Whether the words were
sound or merely thought, he couldn’t have guessed. “I’ll speak with you if you can answer what I
just asked you,” Louis continued, “am I dead? Are you the Pope’s God? Or are you Lucifer?”
“I’ll
answer your questions, but not in the order you asked them,” the voice replied,
a hint of a chuckle evident. “First,
your body is not dead, despite your clumsy effort to make it so. It’s being healed by my student, Horyn, who is
one of the daughters of Remi, who was also once known as Cort Joran, brother of
Jace Joran, the mighty Preacher. Ahh
those were the days, Louis, watching the revival of the immortals, or Guardians
as they would be known for the short time they were united.. The Joran brothers were feared across the
galaxy, and I doubt that Cort ever told you the story of how he made away with
Excalibur and Pratha, which made him become one of but a handful to ever wield
two blades. Those cursed blades. But I digress. As
for your awareness, obviously it’s not dead either, as you’ve already been able
to determine for yourself. Your flesh
container is in a safe place, out of the reach of Cort, where he can no longer
harm you. Your awareness is currently in
this place, which is known as the
Quintessential State, or ‘The Totality’, as newer immortals call it.”
“With
regards to who I am: If I define
myself by flesh existence, my first life ended over ten million Terran years
ago. My species of flesh birth were
known as the Irathans. They’re long extinct,
lost well into the legends of time, much like your Atlantis. You would have seen only vague resemblance
between my original appearance and anything you would recognize as human.”
“I’ve had
two further flesh lives since then, as the life of a grid burner can be quite
rough on the flesh containers. It’s
probably best if I only show you my most recent appearance, as you would find
it the easiest to relate to, and understand I think. The physical body of that
life has been dust for over forty thousand years, but I still remember it well.
For what it’s worth, this was my
appearance.”
Louis was
suddenly faced with the strangest-looking man he had ever seen. The image
shocked Louis, for no matter how much Remi had told tales of other species in
the galaxy, to be faced by the reality of it, was different. To start with, its arms were replaced by
tentacles; four of them no less, which no doubt served the purpose of
hands. The rest of it looked vaguely
like a toad somehow twisted into near-human form.
“As you can
tell, my most recent flesh species was amphibious,” the voice said. “My name
that I most recently used was Creh’mysan, and it will suffice for the chat
we’re going to have. That particular
flesh was destroyed and my awareness sent into the Quintessential State during
battle with beings, whose names best translate to ‘the Jealous Ones’. They
invaded my ancient homeworld and turned it into a base for their vile
experiments.”
Creh’mysan
paused, and Louis swore he heard him breathe, or was it a sigh? “To answer your final question: no, I’m not your God, or anyone else’s,” the
voice concluded. “Many immortals have
played the role of gods over time, and some, indeed, still do. However, I
myself have never had time for such foolishness. What I am, at least at the present time, is exactly
what you are while you’re in this
place: awareness and thought. Nothing more, and nothing less, for it is all
that is needed in here. Now, would you
speak with me, young Terran Guardian?”
“What do
you want to speak of?” Louis asked, once again not knowing if his words were
thought or sound or both.
‘I would
speak of many things,” Creh’mysan replied. “Of what you want from your mortal
life, what you would wish to achieve within the limitations of your flesh
existence, and of your destiny. All of these are questions, which, if what
Horyn has told me is correct, and I know it is, Cort has never honestly asked
you, and perhaps never will. His soul is
poisoned, by Pratha, the blade of Fire.
I know you hate him Louis, but if you are to achieve your destiny, you
need to help Cort.”
“Yes,
Pratha,” Louis replied, remembering back to the age of the Khans. He had touched Pratha once and it had spoken
to him, leaving him feeling less than complete.
“But for
now, it is I, who needs to ask questions of you.
I too have many I would ask, but for now
I will satisfy my curiosity by asking you only the two most important. Your answer to both of them will dictate
everything else I could tell you, and the ways in which I could help you.”
“Help me?”
Louis asked, suddenly feeling irritated, as if he were dealing with Remi’s
manipulation all over again. “I’ve heard
that before. What is it you want from me? Everybody
wants something from me it seems. Does
it never end? You want to use me just like Remi, don’t you?”
“Being as I
really don’t know Cort personally, I can’t answer that. I only know what I have seen, and he is too
powerful for me to directly enter his mind and find the answers, at least from
here in the Quintessential State,” Creh’mysan replied. “However, I can assure you that I have no
intention of forcing you into something against your will. In fact, to force you into anything against
your will is not allowed. Nevertheless,
you will figure out for yourself sooner or later that everybody uses everyone else, in one way or another. To try and claim otherwise is a brutal and
clumsy lie, or so I have discovered.”
“Horyn has
told me that Cort has a tendency to force his students to do things against
their will, using the justification that it is in their supposed ‘best interest’.
From that standpoint, I can say that I
have no interest in using you in the way your current master would, it will
defeat all that must be done, for it has to be of your own free will. All choices are your own, St. Croix, including
whether or not you wish for your flesh to retain its mortal life. If you have no interest in hearing what I have
to say, I can perhaps contact another. I
only ask that you hear me before you decide.”
“Can I
leave this place?” Louis asked.
“Yes,” Creh’mysan
replied, “you can leave it in two ways. Your thoughts and awareness could go
back to your mortal flesh, should you choose for it to continue living, or they
can dissipate to nothingness should you choose for your mortal life to cease. You do not yet have the power to hold on to
your awareness and sense of self in this place without the tether of living
flesh.”
“Perhaps
with the proper training, that will change, but for now, you do not have that
power. Few of the current Guardians do,
and not that many through the ages have ever achieved it. It is I, who currently holds you here, and it
is I, who will release your awareness to whatever fate you choose for it. Hence, the first question I wish to ask you: St.
Croix, do you wish for your mortal life to continue, or do you wish for it to
end?”
“What will
it cost me for it to continue?” Louis
asked, not even trying to hide his bitter cynicism, “what will I owe you and
Horyn?”
“Not as
much as you seem to think,” Creh’mysan said with what Louis guessed
approximated a laugh in the ancient immortal’s most recent flesh species. “Only two things, really. The first is to find yourself, and the second
is to reach your full potential as a Guardian.
I’m sad to say that, from what Horyn has told me, I judge that neither
of those things was likely to happen any time soon under the tutelage of your
current master.”
“I have no
idea what that means,” Louis said.
“That’s
because you’ll have to find out the answer for yourself,” the ancient immortal
replied. “No one else can answer it for
you. I certainly can’t. The answer is different for every person and lies
within you.”
“All right,”
Louis said. “What’s your second question?”
“Haven’t
you already guessed?” the toad-like figure in front of Louis asked. “I want to know if you would like to be my
student; if you are interested in the ancient knowledge I could share with
you? However, I will need the answer to
my first question before I can consider your answer to the second one, young
St. Croix.”
“I suppose
I’d like to go back to my body.” Louis finally said. “That is if I really am
out of Remi’s reach for now, I’ll go.”
“Although I
can’t directly enter Cort’s mind from here in the Totality, as I had already
mentioned, I have been able to
manipulate his ability to sense the presence of other immortals just enough, so
that you will be invisible to his senses until he is specifically made aware of
your presence, whether by yourself, or by someone else. In short, [SK1] Louis, he won’t be able to find
you unless and until you wish to be found, or choose to face him.” The ancient guardian replied. “I’m pleased with your decision. We’ll speak
again when you’re ready to truly understand and appreciate what I would tell
you, and when you are capable of giving me a truly considered and informed
answer to my second question.”
“How will I
know when I’m ready?”
And I will leave you with this, as often it is best to leave it as a mystery.
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